i am hungry

Arry, you have to be both mentally and physically hungry to keep pushing as an entrepreneur.  Never let yourself be too full - you have to ~really~ be hungry to get what you want.  This is what not long ago, one of my favorite fellow woman entrepreneur friends told me.  She's a petite, blonde-haired, feisty woman.  She's sort of like me: says it like it is, pushes against boundaries and walls to move her business, herself, and everything around her forward - but I see her as alittle more badass than me.  :)  She's expanded her business out to other states and will be visiting Seattle very soon for her big 4-0 birthday celebrations.  She's awesome.

I've been eating too well for my comfort.   

I remember very well what it is like to be both mentally and physically hungry.  Starving actually.  I was lucky to go to college on a full ride and with some extra scholarships given to me to help pay for books and room/board.  I used to take the meal plan that the school gave me, cancelling it, then taking that cash and using that to pay for piano lessons, money to live on during the summer breaks, and doing the $3-5/day meal budget.  Fried rice with ketchup and one over-easy egg on top with soy sauce was my staple meal.  Sometimes I'd go to the Chinese fast food place and get this egg-n-tomato dish with rice - make that last at least three meals.  I found a waitressing by the time I got to junior year in college, so the employee meal at 130AM was my main meal on days when I worked.  BTW, Waitressing pays WAY better than the on campus jobs - my grades suffered though.

The toughest times were during my internships in New York City when I had to figure out how to pay for subway fares and food.  Luckily for me, my summer internships always provided good housing for me (thank goodness).  But seriously, working at a publishing company on Fifth Avenue for a summer is not easy at all.  I was able to secure a Journalism fellowship, which gave me $500 for the summer.  $500 to live on for three months in New York City is rough.  My friend's dad bought me a monthly subway pass for a couple months.  I didn't eat dinners.  I lived on one piece of fruit and the $6 California roll that I was able to find in a side street off of Fifth Avenue during my short lunch breaks.  I'd take an extra kit kat bar when I saw them in the candy bowl when I was at a client site and save that for "breakfast" the next day.  A slice of Joe's pizza saved me when I couldn't take it any more and needed food in the evenings.  I remember learning to zap a 3/4 cup of pasta and eating it with a little salt/pepper.  ... and lots of ketchup and rice.  Lost a lot of weight that summer (that was the bonus).... I know you're wondering: No...  I did not want to burden my family - I was determined to do it on my own. 

I've worked my butt off to where I am now - and I'm still not done.  I've been eating well since getting out of school and with my first salaried job at Microsoft and onwards - no doubt about that.  Food, good food, is such a luxury to me.  Still.  How ridiculous it is for me to walk down the street and grab a $10 cocktail and a $15 burger.  Holy cow!!!  I despise wasting food - I eat all leftovers.  With all of my "projects", I have to put down a crapload of investment money.  AllThingsWishful.com - we are bootstrapped and putting in another round of funds.  My patent-pending table needs more prototypes/demos built and licensing contracts made.  I have a mortgage weighing me down.  I have to get smarter - and more creative with the limited funds I have.  I'm recently re-employed at Logic20/20 - but after almost a year of being unemployed, the savings are pretty scarce (and anything I had went into my startup "projects" and living costs).  This is why I'm trying to look at this on the bright-side (thinking about my past, where I am, and the advice about being hungry I had received).  It is time to go on the starvation plan and push forward.  
 
This has got to happen - and NOW!