CoAuthored by Arry Yu/Molly Jones: Crypto Regulator Sends Strong Signal to Foster Innovation
This week, the Washington State Department of Financial Institutions (DFI) announced the creation and launch of the Center for FinTech Information (CFI) to facilitate communication between the DFI and entrepreneurs, investors, and fintech companies. While Washington aspires to be a global hub for blockchain innovation, the lack of transparency and regulatory clarity has long created challenges for innovative crypto and digital asset startups, funds, and investors in the state. The creation of this center is a welcome, positive step forward for the sector, and if effectively staffed and resourced, can help transform the experiences of crypto companies in Washington.

There is enormous potential for innovative financial services in Washington. States like Wyoming and Florida that have embraced the digital asset industry with updated regulations have seen real results in economic growth, diversification of the economy, creation of well-paying jobs, and expansion of equitable access to fiscal services to residents.

The launch of the CFI is critical to ensure Washington’s innovative financial services sector has the opportunity to share in the benefits of the digital asset industry’s success and growth, which is on an exponential trajectory. Washington is already well-situated to become a global innovative fintech hub – boasting a strong innovation ecosystem with top talent and an active venture capital network. With a regulatory system that promotes innovation while enabling consumer protection, Washington can also become a global digital asset hub. We recommend three key near-term priorities for the CFI to advance this mission:

Information and Transparency: The CFI should prioritize providing proactive guidance for businesses engaging with the DFI, as well as how to establish and maintain compliance. For many new businesses, obtaining legal counsel to establish initial compliance can be prohibitively expensive. By publicly sharing information and expanding communication with the business community, the CFI can significantly reduce these costs and remove barriers to entry for many innovators. This would include publishing contact information for DFI staff available to support new businesses in blockchain applications involving financial services, as well as interpretive letters, administrative decisions, and statements on the DFI website. These small steps would greatly facilitate business compliance efforts.

Align with National Standards: There is a lack of consistency with respect to how businesses that deal in digital assets are treated across the states and by the federal government, which creates a significant challenge for many digital asset companies in Washington. The CFI has the opportunity to standardize Washington’s regulations by adopting nationally-accepted FinCEN rules and definitions surrounding fintech and digital assets, as well as clearly outlining any departures from the national standards. This would allow the CFI to ease compliance for blockchain companies while still maintaining rigorous standards that protect consumers.

Partner with the Emerging Technology Community: As the DFI continues to pursue opportunities to bolster innovative fintech in the state, the Washington Technology Industry Association (WTIA) can bring together innovators and industry partners to collaborate on these efforts. Regular communication channels between the DFI and industry — such as the WTIA-DFI Town Hall this week — is critical to advance the dual goals of both consumer protection and innovation. The DFI should also consider organizing working groups with industry participants, quarterly forums to update the community on recent developments, and other platforms to share guidance and priorities, while also learning from industry on the latest innovations.

The WTIA Cascadia Blockchain Council (CBC) looks forward to working with the DFI and industry partners to build a thriving blockchain sector in Washington state, and we applaud the launch of this new office. The WTIA CBC stands ready to partner with the DFI to identify policies and programs that promote innovation, and we invite all emerging financial technology enterprises to join us in our work to promote a robust tech sector in a thriving community.

To learn more about the Cascadia Blockchain Council, contact Arry Yu at arry@washingtontechnology.org. 

Original OpEd here: www.washingtontechnology.org/crypto-regulator-sends-strong-signal-to-foster-innovation/

Geekwire article here: www.geekwire.com/2021/washington-state-launches-center-cater-potentially-regulate-crypto-fintech-companies/

I just had an ad hoc Bitcoin debate. I'm finding, the more I put myself out there on the topic of Bitcoin, the more I learn about myself and my command of the knowledge I've been accumulating to date. I'm still learning - every single day, reading and listening and watching all of the content that keeps on growing. I stuck my typing fingers out and said something asking everyone on a particular call I was on if they'd been tracking Bitcoin. I heard rumblings, ah, yea, I'm still working on setting up my Coinbase account or, yea, I've gotta dollar average on in. Another person, let's call him Joe, went all in on the other side of the argument, Bitcoin is dead, it's not money, and the only currency that'll ever live is the U.S. Dollar. He said I should be worried about 51% attacks. I was told that I needed to study my history better and go look up the term, "Tulip Bubble", and then get back to him. 

Then I got the following screenshots shared with me:

Seemingly harsh, I thought. Study my history better? Tulip Bubble.... Why do people keep bringing up tulips when they are trying to argue against cryptocurrencies and Bitcoin? Tulips. ...  That always surprises me.

Actually, as my business partner says, "the “tulip bubble” as people refer to it is more of a confirmation of human behavior that, again, is a stupendous affirmation of why bitcoin is needed, is the answer."

I debated back and forth in my mind on whether to engage - or to just let this Tulip Joe go.....  and despite my tendencies, decided to go for it. Here's what I wrote in reply (for context, this is a group chat, so there are other folks viewing this discussion going back and forth). This is literally a "copy/paste" of my response:

• If you've truly read the whitepaper for Bitcoin, you know that Bitcoin was created to specifically address the problems of modern money - the U.S. Financial system and the U.S. Dollar (fiat money).
  

​
Macro-economic points: 

• Federal Reserve has cut interest rates to 0%. This is an issue.
• The world is addicted to Quantitative Easing like it's heroin. Trillions of USD printed out of thin air, even in this year alone. "QE4": This is another big issue.
• Nassim Nicholas Taleb (The Black Swan guy) wrote (in beginning of The Bitcoin Standard): "... we only discovered too late: one can macroBS longer than microBS, which is why we need to be careful of whom we endow with centralized macro decisions." ----> basically, those that have claimed to understand macro-economics and have been running the Fed, had no idea what they were doing.
• 1971 US officially went off the gold standard - became fiat money. There's history for you.
• oh yeah, and shortly after that, 1974 -- Nobel Prize winner, Hayek wrote about ("Pretense of Knowledge") how that was going to be a grave mistake, the U.S. dollar becoming a fiat currency, as the world's reserve currency.  And here we are.
• After WWII, 1944, Bretton-Woods Agreement, the U.S. Dollar became the world's reserve currency. Another bit of history. We had the most guns. But today, 2020 - we're at another "Bretton-Woods" cross roads. Did you see the IMF (international monetary fund) meetings that happened this week - the world is moving to digital currencies. China's already got a massive head start. The middle east is working on digitizing quickly. Once all of these digital currencies exist, what's the common digital currency across the globe? Bitcoin.

Supply side - Bitcoin has a limited supply 

• Again, only 21 million total Bitcoin ever available. Only 18.4 million currently in circulation. Math.
• Actually more than 60% of Bitcoin in circulation has not moved - people are using it as a store of value.

Demand side for Bitcoin (which has limited hard capped supply)

• Bitcoin is up more than 70% year to date, and is the best performing asset class in the decade (2010-2020).
• Corporations are now using Bitcoin as the reserve asset part of their treasury: Galaxy Digital, MicroStrategy, Square, etc. This is just the start. There is very few other assets out there that's not simply way over priced and/or not a great store of wealth when you look at the price in terms of gold prices. Demand will continue to go up.
• Actually, despite how "volatile" Bitcoin has been, it's been consistently trending upwards - it beats a lot of other national currencies out there, including the U.S. Dollar. Another example: Turkey. I wouldn't be surprised if nations opt into Bitcoin as a way to leap frog innovation/time to pull themselves out of the dark holes they are in today. Another example: Venezuela, Argentina, Columbia, etc. Again, more support for the Demand side.

As for 51% attack concerns, yes - and now we are much further along with the Bitcoin network. It would literally cost billions of dollars ($15 billion I read somewhere?) to make this happen, if one could find and secure all the hardware, and that alone is really difficult to do for even setting up a small mining operation. The chances are becoming more and more slim as the Bitcoin network has matured - case in point, we now have more and more public companies putting their cash reserves into Bitcoin. It's 2020 now, a lot has happened since 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, and 2019. There is no other currency that is as sound, as secure, as borderless, deflationary, hardcapped, transparent, immutable, decentralized, nonsovereign (as Travis Kling says often), than Bitcoin. My bet is on the digital future, on technology, and on math.

More on the 51% attack concerns: Think about it in terms of the built-in game theory. In short, it's not in the best interests of the miners to try and spend a shit ton of money  to double-spend Bitcoin. They would have to spend a shit ton on equipment, electricity, space to even get a short at rewriting the blockchain. It's like trying to rob the bank for $10 million, after spending $10 million. Makes no sense. The numbers favor all of the people who have an incentive to keep the integrity of the Bitcoin global network is MUCH greater than the number of folks that want to attack it. We saw it - with Bitcoin Cash as the hard fork. That was a critical moment in history and the perfect moment for Bitcoin to have died. It didn't. Bitcoin has only gotten stronger since then. 

RE: Bitcoin and tulips. Yea, this is the knock that we hear often from the "peanut gallery, it's a lazy argument intellectually and very misleading" (as I think Pomp would say about the Tulip argument). I heard a lot about tulips in 2017 and especially in 2018. Those were truly hard times for me personally.

[AND THANK GOODNESS FOR HUMANITY that] Bitcoin didn't die in 2018, sorry. Nor in 2019, sorry, or in 2020. Sorry. You're talking about the ATH (all time high, that was just all kinds of crazy speculation thanks to the ICO's) in 2017, it went from $1k to $20k, and then back down to $3k. It's not a good factual representation for anyone that looks at the market holistically. [I've learned recently that] The Bitcoin average across many weeks, 200 weeks is the better metric - [and as we've seen] Bitcoin is a solid investment. Also look at the number of consecutive days that Bitcoin has been (really boring) and just hanging out over $10k in 2020. ----> really that'll show you that Bitcoin has stabilized a lot since the crazy hey day of 2017. [Technology is evolving FAST. 10 years ago, I had turn-by-turn map directions printed out on paper. Today I have Waze on my phone.] As investors, we should care more about the long term. Things go up and down, and in this case, Bitcoin has been trending up, even with its ups and downs. The technology is much more mature. The network is much bigger.

​And the timing is also, very right.

One more (the U.S. Dollar versus Bitcoin debate): 

I don't know how I did, if all of my facts are straight - they should be close (enough). 

Anyways, I'm a believer in Bitcoin, in bitcoin, and in blockchain. This is the future.

​--Arry 

Saw this talk by Jimmy Song (and Jimmy Song speak live) for the first time when in LA for Russell Okung's Bitcoin is_ conference. So many concepts and ideas that I hadn't thought about before were introduced - and so provocative. I found the talk, had it transcribed, and am sharing it with you, because it really is so good. A couple of my favorite points that really got me thinking:

• The Cantillon Effect: "Alright, so I don't know how many of you know what this is but these are glass beads and this was used in sub-Saharan Africa for money for a very long time. And in fact it makes sense to be money if you heard Saifedean Ammous's talk - it's about hard money versus easy money. Glass just isn't very abundant in some in Africa so it made sense to use this as money. European settlers came in and they recognized that oh they're using glass for money. We know how to make glass we have glass blowers and we have a plentiful supply. So what did they do? They went, made a whole ton of glass beads, and bought up everything. They bought up everything. They were able to print money essentially as a way to take the wealth of everybody that was depending on that as money. And this has an economic name and it's called the Cantillon effect. And the Cantillon effect is essentially this - the first printers are the money, the people that get to spend the money first, they get all of the benefits of the printing of the money. "
• Capitalism is about capital accumulation. It is about creating more so you can you can make even more money and continue to benefit society. In fact, production and entrepreneurship are exactly what happens in a in a hard money civilization because most people aren't going towards investment banking or the money production business. They start using their talents towards something else. They start giving people what they want.
  

Watch the video below from Bitcoin Is_ 's Jimmy Song's talk. So good.

--Arry 

Conference: "Bitcoin is ___"
Speaker: Jimmy Song
Title: Bitcoin is the Ultimate Social Justice
TRANSCRIPTION of above video below here.
 
Alright, how's everyone doing? I know it's like late afternoon right now. Maybe you're feeling a little bit sleepy, maybe you need to get a little coffee. I won't be offended if you fall asleep or something. I'm okay with that just you know I won't judge you too much. Alright, so my talk is called Bitcoin the ultimate social justice and I deliberately titled it that way as a way to provoke maybe a little bit of a reaction because we have a conception of social justice that I think is very flawed and we're going to talk about exactly in which… actually can you change that to the actual slide. Yeah thank you. Otherwise I'm going to get lost… as the ultimate social justice and this is something that I'm very passionate about and this is the way in which Bitcoin will impact society is absolutely huge. So, what I'm going to do is go through an argument essentially arguing that Bitcoin is going to be better for the cause of social justice than pretty much anything else and we're going to look at the current situation - what things are like right now, how fiat money changes a lot of the incentives, and exactly what incentives people have under a fiat money system. Then we're going to talk about Bitcoin now that changes you know the incentive system and how people behave under a Bitcoin system and then talk about the future and how things will change there.
 
So let's look at the cause of what's going on and let's sort of try to define at least what social justice is all about. Alright so we have a lot of problems in the world right? We have a lot of people that are poor, some that are rich, and so on. And we also have you know some people that have more opportunities than others we also have other people that have power over you some people that they can abuse and so on. There's a lot of different problems in the world today and the general way in which social justice sort of defines this or sort of attempts to remedy this is by treating essentially the symptom. And the symptom is kind of like the tip of the iceberg, alright? Like there's a lot more that goes into it than just some somebody is suffering. Generally, if you look at any charity or NGO or government program, they're looking to treat the symptom. This means making sure that the people that are going hungry have food or that the people that don't have housing have a place to stay and so on. But that's treating the symptom. The actual problem is underneath and that's what I want to talk about.
 
So this is the general way in which a lot of NGOs and you know charities and so on, this is how they generally approach the idea of helping people. And you know if you can't read it, it's give a man a fish you feed him for a day, teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime, create a good tutorial and you can teach himself how to fish. This is sort of the way in which a lot of people that are in these spaces of charity and social justice, that's how they think about it. But I would submit to you that this is not the problem. It's not a problem of information. It is not a problem of information at all. It's not about somebody not knowing how to fish.

Fact the real problem is oppression - it is oppression. People have power over other people and that is the real problem here. And when you have oppression well you can do certain things. It's not that the person that's being oppressed doesn't know how to fish, it’s that he has to apply for a fishing license or has to you know get in with government crony in order to fish at scale. It's that they got taxed on the fish that they catch because that's the current law that happens to exist and that's the real problem. It's not that they don't know. Lots of people know. That is not the problem at all.
 
So what happens when there are enough people that are oppressed continually and there are more regulations and things like that that happen is that eventually you end up with revolution. This is the most recent thing that happened that's like that is the Arab Spring. I mean Muslim countries where you had Arab Spring, a lot of them were very oppressive. They had so many rules and it gets worse and worse and worse until basically the people explode. It’s gradually then suddenly and all of a sudden something happens. And so you might be wondering, "okay are we always doomed to this kind of cycle where you know you have a revolution and then you have more and more regulation and more and more oppression and then people get sick of it and then they revolt again"? Yes, but things have changed. Bitcoin is something that's new and different and we just heard from Alex who's talking about government surveillance and technology that's used to make people more and more oppressive, but there's also a technology that's taking the power of money printing away from the state. Financial oppression, believe it or not, is the biggest source of oppression that you can have. In many ways, that's what we're going to be talking about going forward. 
 
Alright, so we talked about the current problems and my argument in this section is that the real oppression is easy fiat money - is easy fiat money. Alright, so I don't know how many of you know what this is but these are glass beads and this was used in sub-Saharan Africa for money for a very long time. And in fact it makes sense to be money if you heard Saifedean Ammous's talk - it's about hard money versus easy money. Glass just isn't very abundant in some in Africa so it made sense to use this as money. European settlers came in and they recognized that oh they're using glass for money. We know how to make glass we have glass blowers and we have a plentiful supply. So what did they do? They went, made a whole ton of glass beads, and bought up everything. They bought up everything. They were able to print money essentially as a way to take the wealth of everybody that was depending on that as money. And this has an economic name and it's called the Cantillon effect. And the Cantillon effect is essentially this - the first printers are the money, the people that get to spend the money first, they get all of the benefits of the printing of the money. 
 
And it's something that Richard Cantillon noticed in the 1700s. He used to work as a banker and then you wrote you know some economic treatises, but that's essentially what happens. The thing about the Cantillon effect that's so seductive is that the population doesn't really notice right away. It's very slow. When you're inflating money, when you're adding new money to the population, you don't notice oh this is going to be worthless later. You know it's a very gradual thing and then very sudden. And this has some really pernicious effects including long term uncertainty. And among other things that it does is it increases consumption and rent-seeking. By consumption I mean just like sort of buying things for now alright? Like YOLO or FOMO or whatever. And rent-seeking in the sense that - and the way I define rent-seeking is taxing some transaction without any adding any value and there are plenty of people that do that. 
 
Here's a chart of the health care system in America today and you can notice that the number of physicians has not gone up very much, but the number of administrators has exploded. What is going on? Well there's a lot of money going into the healthcare system and as a result there's a lot more rent seekers - a lot of people that are taxing transactions that aren't really adding anything. Now I could show you a similar chart for education and government and many other organizations, but this is just what happens when you have a lot of money printing. There's no real… there's a lot of people that end up sitting in the middle of transactions making money essentially for doing nothing. 
 
And this has some consequences among others this is the question that gets asked. How do I get a job? And if you know anyone that's unemployed or in college right now, this is the question that they ask - how do I get a job? And if you think about it, this is the wrong question because in a sense it's asking where can I fit right; what rent seeking opportunity can I get? It's not about adding value at all. It's about finding a place in the world where you can survive right? It has a very static view of the world where there's only so much to go around and you need to get your piece - and that is the wrong attitude. 
 
And this has some serious consequences and real social ills that come out of it. Here's a cartoon. I don't know if you can read it but it's sort of from a perspective of a millennial. I don't want much in life, just sick clothes, a bunch of money, convenient restaurant options, free shipping is always nice, and like a sense of purpose I guess. I love this cartoon because it does sort of like capture that mentality, but think about it. If you are a rent seeker in in this economy, what are you going to be thinking about? You're not thinking about changing the world or providing value for the world. You're thinking about all this other stuff and why is that? Well it's because deep down inside you know you are a leech; that you are really stealing from everybody else. And I'm serious about this. There's a lot of people that are going through having to deal with the fact that they are not contributing at all to society. We have epidemic levels of depression. Where do you think that comes from? If deep down inside you know that you are not contributing anything to society well how should you feel? And think about it. There's a lot of other people that when they have that voice inside that's telling them okay you're not really doing anything useful, well they go around and drown that. We have epidemic levels of all kinds of addictions too – alcoholism, drugs, even like TV or getting obsessed with the latest Netflix series, or you know eating or whatever. There's a lot of different addictions that everyone can get into. That causes real social ills. And eventually you get to a situation where you have a lot of run seeking and eventually you collapse. 
 
These are the ruins of Rome right? The Roman civilization famously devalued their money. Diocletian went from 70% silver in a denarii down to like 5% and that caused a lot more rent-seeking that caused a lot more people that weren't doing anything and eventually the whole edifice just sort of crumbled under the weight of all the rent seekers that were out there. So Fiat leads to decay. It's a fundamental part of it. 
 
Alright so why is that? Why does Fiat cause all this? Well there are two ways essentially to make money in any system. The first is to create more of the monetary medium - more of the monetary medium. So with gold or something like that you have to do the hard work of actually mining it. With central bank, they can just print the money and this is actually more expensive than what they do which is update a database that says I have 200 million more dollars. So there's creating more of the monetary medium. 
 
In the second case the other way to make money is to provide goods and services and this is what actually builds civilization. If you're successful with creating a good or service, then you're going to be adding something beneficial to everybody else. It's what they want. 
 
The key thing to realize is that the former does not add anything to society. If you're creating more of the medium of monetary exchange you are not contributing anything. You're not making anything. You're essentially stealing from everyone else through inflation. The latter definitely adds to society because by definition you're doing something better than what's out in the market already. You're doing something faster, more conveniently, more you know securely, or something - you're doing something better than what other people in the market are doing because there's a market for your services. And as a result you're adding to the pie. You're growing the pie. You're making something better. And the key thing to realize is when there's easy money people go towards the former. When there's hard money people go towards the latter. 
 
So when you have easy money for example you want to go into the money production business because the cost of producing that money is very cheap relative to the value that you're going to get out, but when there's hard money only the specialists go in. So if you're… not many of you are probably gold mining right now and that's because you have to be an expert in gold mining in order to be a gold miner and this is actually one of the biggest mistakes that people make when they come into Bitcoin is they think oh I can go print my own money buying miners or something, but in fact it turns out that only the real specialists can make money off of mining. And this is really terrible because think about where people have been going… where the best, smartest, and most talented individuals have been going into for the last 50 years? They've been going into investment banking, right? And they go into it not because they happen to be talented in investment banking, they go into it because that's where the margins are. That's where they can make the most profit. It's much easier to be an investment banker and make 300 million dollars a year than to create a three-billion-dollar company and keep three hundred million dollars for yourself. That's the reality that we are living in is that because of easy money everyone is motivated to go towards that direction and that's a real tragedy. That's how civilization gets built and hopefully this picture comes up. 

Alright, so I was born in Seoul, Korea and I found this nice picture of the contrast between then and now. See, 1900 it was kind of a backwater Asian place and after you know a 120 years later you have this thriving city that you have now. That happens because you have a lot of entrepreneurs, because you have people building things, that are creating things for the benefit of others. In a way, they're creating goods and making the world better and they get to profit - that's the beauty of capitalism. 

So let's talk about the new system right? Because we're are under a fiat money system well how is that going to change? The revolution is Bitcoin and the revolution comes in from the fact that we have property rights. We have control over our own money right now. If you have money in a bank account the government can confiscate it from you. They can accuse you of being a drug dealer or using it for terrorism or something like that. Even if you have money under your mattress, they can just inflate it away. They can print another eight hundred billion dollars to different investment banks or something like that. We don't have property rights over our money, but with Bitcoin we do. We can take the power of money printing away from the state and as a result we have a lot more long-term certainty because we can save for the future. A lot of people think that capitalism is like materialism or something like that. It's this idea you know I got the sickest car or something like that. That is not it at all. Capitalism is about capital accumulation. It is about creating more so you can you can make even more money and continue to benefit society. In fact, production and entrepreneurship are exactly what happens in a in a hard money civilization because most people aren't going towards investment banking or the money production business. They start using their talents towards something else. They start giving people what they want. And this increases production, increases value for everybody. There's a really good illustration in Saifedean's book which I'll repeat here, but at one point in time people used to catch fish with their hands and it would take… maybe you can catch only like one or two fish a day by trying to catch with your hands. At some point somebody decided okay you know what I'll catch an extra fish and sort of half star for a day and I will make a fishing pole and using a fishing pole - that's capital accumulation - they can maybe catch four fish a day and then doing that for about a week, you can save up, take another week to make a boat. Now maybe you hire somebody to drive the boat while you go fish. You get better and better productivity out of people as you have more creativity and entrepreneurship to the point where we are today where we have a, you know, a fishing vessel takes like five years to build cost millions of dollars but you have eight people on that ship and they can catch hundreds of thousands of fish in a week. That's real productivity; that's real entrepreneurship; that's real value that the rest of civilization gets to have.
 
Anyway the pertinent question that people ask in this case is not how do I get a job; it's what do people want. And this is the right question it isn't about finding your place in a rent-seeking society. It is about what value can I bring to other people and this is absolutely critical for entrepreneurship. I'm speaking to you right now as a speaker, as an author and stuff like that, but for the first years of my life I was a coder. I was a programmer. Think anyone ever paid me to go speak in front of people or to write a book? Not a chance. Those are things that I had inside of me that I didn't realize I could use for that sort of stuff but being an entrepreneur, being a producer, I was able to see ok well that's something that I can do. In a Fiat money society, what you end up with are very specific roles right if a company hires you to be an accountant that's all you can really be. They don't hire you to also be a publicist or something like that not unless you're in a start-up. But it's much more fulfilling to be an entrepreneur in part because you get to use all of who you are instead of this narrow slice that's defined by the company. And that's something that hard money allows and Bitcoin is the path to get there because that takes the power of money printing from the state and that makes it very difficult to go into the money production business eliminating a lot of rent-seeking.
 
Anyway, let's examine what that actually means and what that actually looks like. So one of the things that's really scary about Bitcoin is that you know ownership is pretty scary. This is a cartoon you can probably look at it later. It's about somebody that newly bought a house and you know doesn't think that he's ready for a home ownership. Fact of the matter is were not used to the personal responsibility that Bitcoin requires. There's a lot of people that you know… like even Bitcoin core developers, if they have to move their Bitcoins, they get really nervous. Why? Because it's scary having to handle a lot of money right, where it might be permanently lost. Everything is centralized in a sense to take away that fear of having to move or be responsible for a lot of money and that's convenient right because you don't want to lose money to a bank robber or something like that where if you had like a gold bar in your house and it gets taken away from you all your savings disappear. That's kind of scary, but at the same time, we've lost something we've lost something as a civilization as a result of all that centralizing of responsibility and it's this idea of personal responsibility. See when you have personal responsibility, it helps because you start caring about the thing that you're responsible for you. You want to make it grow. And you know those of you that are parents, you kind of understand what that means. A lot of it is helping the thing that you're in charge of. And when you do that it leads to a lot of good things because when you have long term certainty, when you're when you're thinking about ownership and you you're used to the responsibility, now you can set goals and have a purpose, and that in turn leads to a lot of building. And instead of the sort of the rent seeking job that you might have where your soul is telling you, you are not doing anything good, when you are producing something for the rest of civilization that is beneficial, it's much easier to get up in the morning. It's much easier to live and know that you are contributing something. You don't have to drown yourself in alcohol or drugs or sugar or whatever it is that you might be addicted to. It becomes something different. And that is the future that we want to have with Bitcoin. 
 
And really the key here is that we have a path to a peaceful revolution. It used to be that history was you know just a regime that would get more and more authoritarian until there was a revolution. That's like one view, kind of cynical view of history, but now with Bitcoin we have the ability to decentralize the power. See a lot of the social justice advocates, what they think about is okay if only my guy were in charge, things would be different. If only my guy were there, then everything would be okay. That's the wrong problem. It's still centralized power. With Bitcoin, we can start taking some of that power back and give it to ourselves. And as a result, all of the rent seekers that are propped up, we walk off the platform that goes away naturally and that's a very good thing. We don't want waste in our society. I love this picture because it has the Statue of Liberty which stands for freedom in the foreground and you have all these buildings that are built by big banks in the background. 
 
The prosperity that the U.S. experienced in the 19th century versus the 20th century are profoundly different. 19th century we were under a hard money standard and a lot of stuff was built during that era. The 20th century, it was mostly because of the dollar hegemony. It was the result of the dollar being the world standard and being able to use that to gain a lot of wealth from other countries. And thinking about the 19th century, there is a really cool phrase that's part of why I wear the cowboy hat. 
 
The phrase is, “Go west young man. Go west young man.” Now they were saying this not just to people that wanted to you know pan for gold or something like that. They were saying this to nearly everybody because say you are like 22 years old, maybe you're a new baker or a barrister or you know cobbler, whatever. The thing is, if you stayed on the East Coast, you would have to compete against everybody else that was a cobbler or a baker or a barrister and it would be very difficult because they had like 20 - 30 years’ experience on you. How are you going to compete against those people? They already had the clientele and everything. Well if you went out West, what happened? There weren't that many bakers or cobblers or barristers and you could make a lot more of yourself very quickly that way. Bitcoin gives us a new frontier. Bitcoin gives us a new frontier and it makes all of this happen a lot faster. And ultimately, this is why I think that a lot of social justice people have the wrong conception of human value. It isn't that we're not feeding them or housing them or clothing them - that's not the tragedy. Yeah it is a tragedy that's people are starving or don't have homes or don't have clothes or don't have you know freedoms and so on. That isn't the real tragedy. The real tragedy is that these people aren't contributing to civilization. The real tragedy of the starving African child isn't that the child is starving - I mean that's a tragedy too - the real tragedy is that that child has no chance to express their creativity, entrepreneurship, and inventiveness by contributing to civilization and creating something that none of us have thought before by creating businesses, by making something better - that's the real tragedy of centralized power is that it oppresses so many people so that we don't get to benefit from the tremendous human capital that already exists out in the world. By bringing sound money back through Bitcoin, that is the ultimate social justice.

I just read The Profile by Polina Marinova Pompliano (see above photo) and "Words and Character" do not carry enough weight these days. By the way, I highly recommend subscribing to The Profile, if you haven't yet. I was a fan when she did the Term Sheet at Fortune Magazine - and continue to be a fan. Today's Profile Dossier is on Hugh Jackman. I love this actor... and after reading about him today, I love him even more.

At the end of the article, there is a list of "techniques to try".... and one of them really hit a chord with me. Big deep one that's been on my mind a lot recently. 

From about 2007 to about 2015, I had a really good friend. We met through salsa dancing and I remember just being so moved by the fresh energy and zest for life she used to carry. She's off the charts amazing as a dancer too - I'd often sit on the side watching her. She had a way of dancing that was so detailed and natural - it was like watching an exotic car move effortlessly in a sea of Toyotas and Hondas. Beautiful. I tend to just fall in love with the people I bring into my life - and perhaps I put them on a pedestal too. Wonderful treasures of laughter, hugs, memories, and more. 

We went to each other's weddings. Our friends became her friends, and vice versa.

Then it started (again). I'm not sure if it's me. It's happened several times now where since I'm the only thing common, I can't help but think it's me. Maybe I'm not good enough. Maybe I'm just not that interesting. Maybe no one really wants to be friends with me in the first place. Am I even worth anyone's time? It's a downward spiral of sadness, and self-pity.

We'd be making plans to visit San Francisco, and of course, I'd send a note to my usual favorite friends to see while there. I'm usually an introvert and seek more of those intimate conversations with family/friends. Only if time is truly limited, I'll throw everyone into one big dinner or drinks...

She was on this list of friends I truly enjoyed seeing. The first time it happened, we were supposed to meet for a drink at happy hour. Then about an hour before, she was tired so wanted to push it to later. It became a dinner plan. Then around dinner, it became dessert. Then around dessert time, it became after dinner drinks... then late night drinks... then the next day.

My husband also thought it was weird. We brushed it off the first few times as oh well, the timing must have been difficult... oh bummer, they must be really busy... ...

​Words and Character. Shouldn't they mean something?

Then on subsequent attempts on following trips to San Francisco, plans would be made and broken again and again. And the questions of, who else is going to be there? Is anyone else going to be meeting up with us? ... Is there anyone notable that she would miss meeting if she didn't come out to meet up with me? ...

It just was not working out. I suppose I could have confronted her candidly about what I was experiencing. Then again, the relationship at that point now had a giant chasm of doubt in between. I did not trust that I knew anything about her anymore. The character and values that are so important to me didn't seem to match. Then I had to make a conscious decision and remove her from my mental list of folks that I wanted to see, and/or wanted to see me... I took it as perhaps I'm just not that exciting enough for her. Perhaps not beautiful enough. Perhaps not influential enough. Just not enough - and perhaps most definitely, we're not a fit for each other anymore. It was causing me so much heartache so I quietly went a different direction.

Experiences where family and friends don't keep their word puts a dent in the trust tree. Words and Character - they should mean something. Put enough dents into the trunk of the tree and it'll fall down and die. Perhaps it stems from a childhood trauma - like so many of these things we think are unique in our adult lives.... I used to run home every day hoping to see my father after school. He was never there.... and then only once he was there standing behind the front screen door when I got home.

And then, he was never there again.

​Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. Tapping my shoulders.

Warmly,
​Arry 

Sharing some of the great work we're doing as the Cascadia Blockchain Council. Enjoy!
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When it comes to blockchain, what it is, its use cases, and the industries using it, there’s a lot of information out there. You can admit it: maybe you feel mystified by blockchain technology.
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Rest assured you’re not alone. While it’s true that blockchain gets a high volume of media coverage, that doesn’t mean it’s being written about clearly, comprehensively, or even accurately. No standard definition of blockchain exists globally, creating confusion and often misinformation that obscures this emerging technology’s legitimacy. This can hinder the policymaking process, deter investors, and generally leave the massive potential of blockchain technology untapped. 

This past one (1) year, I've learned a lot. October 2018 to October 2019, I've learned an incredible amount about me, my relationships, recovering from significant challenges, the meaning of life, and much more:

1. No matter what happens, I feel comfortable with my choices to date. Not everyone agrees with me all the time - and that is okay with me. I need to live life and be true to the foundational values that are core to who I am, and to do it with integrity. They say, "listen to your gut" - I know that I need to be attuned to my gut. I've been practicing it, a lot.
2. I know that in the hardest of times, I will fight as hard as I can for what I believe to be the right thing to do. I'm a warrior. To steal the words from a mentor of mine, Empathy Warrior. I will go to the ends of the earth for my love, our children, our family, our tribes, and our mission in life. I'm a fighter that has now learned how to be a peace maker with myself, others, and more.
3. Life is an absolute gift. Spend as much of every moment with the people that matter most in life - and work to amplify only what should be amplified. 
4. Creating life is an absolute gift. I've written about the wretched heartache and loss of miscarriage. Being blessed with two of the most amazing young boys has made me feel so much gratitude and fullness that nothing else the world could give me. I would love to have the opportunity to have more children, if it is possible.
5. Marriage to Dae has been my life's greatest commitment. It's very hard at (a few) times, and it's amazing at (many) other times. Marrying the right person is critical - and it's not based on height, income, pedigree, or anything like that at all. It takes a lot of self awareness, flexibility, empathy and listening, and true partnership of mind, body, emotion, mission, and vision. How lucky am I that he persisted, week after week, month after month despite my ignorant declarations that I would never ever marry him. :)
6. Stories matter, a lot. The internal stories we tell ourselves to tie the missing context as very young children become the living stories of our adult selves. Word choices matter. Where we use these words, whether in public forums or behind closed doors in secret matters. How we use these words, whether to slash at someone's soul or to bridge ideas together, matters. Why we use words at all, whether to add value to the community or to get something off the chest, also matters. Not everything has to be said - and yet, sometimes over communicating means everything. 
7. Pacing makes a huge difference. Pacing means having the control and skill to be able to throttle velocity. Pacing means even in the midst of chaos, being able to find time for slow thinking, meditation, and breathing. Space. (S)Pace. Take an hour off, a day off, a week off, a year off - whatever you can afford and make happen. I've been lucky to have been able to take a year off, and it's literally been one of the best gifts I never knew I needed. 
8. In chaos, stand still. In chaos, the human inclination is the run fast(er), scream, yell, and fight. I've learned, do the opposite. Stand still. Walk slower. Take a break. Hug your loved ones. The truth, what matters most will become crystal clear, and chaos will become tranquility. Every time I've started using my sledge hammer in times of chaos, it's been destructive in a bad way. Every time I've held my tongue/slowed down/been intentionally quiet in times of chaos, it's been constructive in a very good way. "Go wide before you decide." 
9. Incentives drive everything. When alliances appear to be "random", when people go out of their way to show (or not show) their support, when "catch-22" conflicting situations arise, start by asking about each party's incentives. WIIFM. What's in it for them. Most people are just hungry - hungry for love, for attention, for recognition, for a paycheck, for a chance at opportunity. A few are plain greedy. 
10. Having a gratitude state of mind is like wearing rose-colored glasses. I am so thankful these days, and as a result, I am at peace with who I am and the state of life. No, that does not mean everything is going great. It means I am happy with the present. The colorful fall leaves are beautiful. Seeing how hard my husband works for our family's happiness makes me so grateful for his giving heart. Our sons are gifts - pure, loving, and curious. Our community has some very big hearted really good people in it. It really is a great time to be alive.

Want the abbreviated version of what I've learned this past year? The summary is that the magic key ingredient to everything is empathy. Most of us are trying to make a mark, to do something with life, and to be a good valuable member of the community. Sometimes, a person may get wrapped up in the chaos they are in and respond too quickly. Another time, a person may poke a bear a little too hard with a stick that is too sharp and prickly. Emotions are real - and it's very important to not let the emotions get the best of us. Don't forget to breathe and find empathy.

​--Arry 

My last post was my best 3 AM attempt to synthesize all of the voices and put into one holistic map of what’s going on locally in Seattle.  We as humans, myself included, are bombarded with noise all day long - the billboard signs, the yard signs, the Facebook and Twitter feeds, emails, and yes, even getting unsolicited text messages from candidates (not cool = Tammy Morales).  It’s increasingly difficult to find that quiet thinking time. It’s very difficult to figure out who has what incentives, why are they pushing a particular candidate (or not), and what is most important for me and my community.  
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My last post upset some people - even upset some friends.  Hopefully, we can disagree and still like each other.

Here are five additional thoughts on the topic of Ari Hoffman and Civic Discourse:

1. Public servants need to practice stewardship.  Public servants that hold office should hold the idea of stewardship as a core principle; it should be central to the why they get up every day to do the work they do for the community.  Stewardship. Reminder, Mirriam-Webster defines stewardship as “the careful and responsible management of something entrusted to one's care stewardship of resources.”  Resources like: publicly funded dollars, buildings, roads, the environment, and even people who reside in or work for that particular community.  Ari Hoffman has demonstrated through action, not just words, the principle of stewardship and discipline I expect to see from those that serve the community.  Some examples:
   1. Vandals caused over $230,000 in damages to a local Jewish cemetery, including strewn needles and bottles.  As a board member of this cemetery, Ari went above and beyond. He raised awareness. He went to the news for help. He went to the city for help.  He still has not gotten the support he originally sought. “Hoffman did share photos with KIRO 7 as proof that the cemeteries have been disrespected, needles near tombstones, feces discarded near them or simply left on top of grave plots. He also said empty bottles and discarded drug paraphernalia led him to believe some people were partying near the plots, “people are doing drugs off the tombstones.”  Most people forget the dead and elderly - what I see is a community and a man that shares a forgotten kind of respect for those that came before us.  Ari has a kind of stewardship that I want for our city; someone who will fight for everyone, even those who no longer have a voice to fight for themselves, like the human dead among us.
   2. On safe injection sites - a very political topic in Seattle - again Ari has demonstrated the kind of stewardship I want to see. Yes - there have been many studies that may prove that they work, and there may be a lot of benefits.  And yes, there are studies that show that they may not work (as in a new study in the International Study of Drug Policy). It’s still not actually clear if they work or not given inherent complexities. While seen as completely flabbergasting, Ari Hoffman is doing the right thing by pushing back on safe injection sites.  We should be questioning if what people want is a magic pill to solve the challenges and is that best magic pill, safe injection sites? Who wants the safe injection site down the street from where they live?  Who wants it in the neighborhood where playgrounds, children, and families strive to thrive? Key stewardship point: Ari Hoffman went even further by taking personal time and resources to go check out first hand to understand what safe injection sites are and whether it may or may not make sense.  He went to San Diego. He went to Vancouver, BC. Ari took personal time, and personal resources to go learn about the issue. Has any other candidate done that?   And yes, there are always at least three sides to any story - what he demonstrated again and again, is his willingness to do the hard work to think for himself. He speaks truth to power - even though many of us don’t want to hear it.  That’s stewardship. We may not all agree on his point of views or what he saw or the story he tells based on what he saw, we all have to agree that his kind of stewardship is what the community needs.
2. Is Ari Hoffman conservative? No and Yes. If you mean, what some people call “right-wing, MAGA and NRA loving Republican?  No. Conservative meaning preferring a sober and evidence-based, practical approach to finding solutions to problems?  Yes. How did this idea of Ari Hoffman being an ultra-conservative come about?
   1. The Stranger was founded by Tim Keck, who had previously co-founded the satirical newspaper The Onion, and cartoonist James Sturm. Its first issue came out on September 23, 1991. It calls itself "Seattle's Only Newspaper," an expression of its disdain for Seattle's two dailies (the Seattle Times and the now-defunct print edition of the Seattle Post-Intelligencer) and The Stranger's main rival, the Seattle Weekly. The paper regularly covers Seattle City Council politics.  The Stranger is generally very liberal and progressive in its perspectives.  The Stranger has positioned him as "ultra-conservative" - and unfortunately, people have taken that to be truth without actually looking to see if it is true.
   2. Ari Hoffman also has accepted all and ANY invitation for an interview.  This is NOT a politically accepted thing to do, especially if you are a candidate running for office.  Surprising to me, because in theory, isn’t it a good thing to be willing to have a conversation with every person (no matter what their beliefs are)?  What I’ve learned is that if you’re running for office in Seattle, you decline an interviews with the NRA for example. You decline to even have a conversation.  Ari didn’t. He thought for himself and went, that doesn’t make any sense. Isn’t it a good thing to have honest conversations, despite differences?  
   3. The topic of safe injection sites again.  In district two of Seattle, one of the most racial diverse, progressive districts here, most people are very liberal and very progressive - leaning towards “democratic socialism”.  It’s literally “not cool” to question if safe injection sites actually work. As one person wrote on my facebook page regarding Ari, “he is actively sharing opinions and his new video that is very much out of alignment on current best practices and research based approaches for homelessness. “  It hasn’t been proven yet.  How many of the folks that support safe injection sites want one  across the street from where they live? Then is the idea to support progressive ideas as long as they are placed “somewhere else”, not in our neighborhood?  Let’s be honest here.
3. Civic discourse is when people communicate with one another about the political, social, cultural or economic issues that their community face to begin a conversation or debate.  Today, in Seattle and beyond, most of us are afraid and wary about sharing our true thoughts about anything. A lot of people are hard-wired with all kinds of triggers and hence, a ready-to-wear angry emotional reaction to whomever or whatever source made the disagreeable statement.  This is not how civic discourse happens. We’re Democrat or Republican - ready to shut the other side down without even trying out a thought experiment to really consider what they are trying to say. Hey, remember, most of us don’t have all the right words and don’t know how to say something “the right way”.  We’re all trying. And while many of us are being re-trained to embrace diversity - diversity of color, race, sexual orientation, and more - most of us are absolutely hardwired to distance ourselves and reject ideological diversity. What’s wrong with learning more about the other very different person? What’s wrong with meeting with a die-hard NRA loving person to share disagreements and to talk about it?  What’s wrong with asking the “stupid question”? In business, it’s supposedly encouraged. What about in community and in politics?
4. We all live in bubbles.  There have been warnings here and there that say especially because of media and the social media algorithms, we are primed to exist in “bubbles” of only similar ideology and like-minded folks we agree with.  Every “like” in Facebook means you’ll see even more posts from that person or entity you already agree with. How do we combat bubbles? We have to actively seek opinions, media, and posts that are different than the ones you agree with. For example: Are you a die-hard Democrat?  Follow some die-hard Republicans.  
5. Character matters when I vote.  Safety for me is top of mind because of all the violence my family has personally experienced in the past couple of years.  I’m also looking at behaviors that indicate character. I’m looking at actions that demonstrate discipline and respect. I’m looking to find commonalities - like family orientation and having had children.  I’m looking at length of journey to date - I do NOT want someone who’s in the moonlight years of their career, I want candidates who have some life experience, have some good work experience, and are looking to leave a mark still in the world.  I want someone who will get up again and again after they’ve fallen. I want candidates that will speak truth to power, speak truth period, even if it is not the “PC” thing to say or do. Again, this is why, I’m voting for Ari Hoffman in District 2.  He’s a little flamboyant in his delivery and presentation. He’s a little bit like a bull in a China shop with his political skills. He’s like a gorilla who’s charging through brick walls and bashing down twine that’s in his way. That’s who I want in Seattle Council - fighting for safety, fighting for respect of our green spaces and parks, fighting for a little bit of common sense and practicality in finding the right kind of humane solutions for everyone.

At the end of the day, whether a person is old/young, white/black/yellow/green, Democrat/Republican, white collar/blue collar, citizen / immigrant - we are actually far more alike than different.  We are all human. If we start with that as the foundational place for any discussion, any disagreement, any kind of civic discourse - we’ll find that generally: 

• We ALL want and consider ourselves to be good people.
• We all want safe spaces for ourselves, our children, and our families.
• We all want safe, clean neighborhoods.
• We all want better lives for the poor, sick, and weak.
• We all want access to decent schools, education, and a way to grow.
• We all want access to reliable public/private transportation, roads, and more.
• We all want access to affordable, good homes.

We are all human.  Likely, we all want the same things for ourselves and each other.  Let’s start there, in the name of humanity -- and then work to figure out the details, the different approaches and ideas, and get there, together. 

​--Arry

Video of Women in Blockchain that was made for the Blockchain NW conference here in Seattle on September 10-11, 2018.

" I'm excited because the more opportunities where we can bring thought leaders, people that are really active in the technology space in Seattle.  You know that Seattle is the hub for cloud technologies, artificial intelligence, which means we are at the hub of technologies when it comes to the digital evolution with cloud, devices, mobile, machine learning, data data data, which is the heart of blockchain.  So it's gonna be really exciting to bring all of these thought leaders, have us trade notes, build those relationships and work together in building the new future."  --Arry

Making decisions whilst drowning in ambiguity and chaos.

Yes - that describes what it's like to be a founder and CEO of a startup.  That also describes what it's like to do a tokensale, an ICO, or anything in this new complex-business model blockchain "stuff".   

Making decisions whilst drowning in ambiguity and chaos holding a newborn baby in one hand and the Empire State Building in the other hand while balancing on a tight rope standing completely buck naked in front of the mob in a crowded stadium.

That's more like what life has been like the past 12 months and continues to be like for me personally.  It's surreal.  Time is moving both so slowly and at "warp" speeds at the same time.  Most of the time when I'm in a meeting, I am constantly having this "out-of-body" experience that allows me to walk around in the room mentally, while at the same time sitting in the chair and experiencing the meeting firsthand.  Surreal.  Sometimes my ghost body gets "stuck" in the physical body, where I'm trapped, blind, and suffocating.

There are also many times when it's just really tough.  Working with white spaces and green companies, we don't usually have a playbook of best practices to look to.  We don't have a board (of advisors or investors) to turn to on speed dial that can provide wisdom and a sounding board.  And when a company is growing so fast moving through the stages of its evolution in weeks and months, rather than years - without realizing it, many of the things that a company does actually is setting precedent for its future.  Forever.

In moments of really tough decisions, I play the scenario in my head over and over and over.  It's me on professional judgment day.  I'm standing before a jury of my professional heroes and heroines like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, Meg Whitman, Peter Thiel, Ben Horowitz, Steven Sinofsky, Mary Barra, Sarah Imbach, Jeffrey Friedberg, and many more.  It's really important to me that I can look at myself in the mirror, and also picture myself standing before the jury of heroes and heroines.  I look for "defensible", logical, and figuring out what is the real intent of the decision that makes sense - and then look to what kind of precedent that it will set for the forever future for our employees, our culture, our advisors, our communities, ... and most importantly, our society.  Humanity.

And so, that is the state of where I am today - mentally standing before the professional jury.  

​And fighting daily to find "space".  Got tips?

--Arry

I pushed and pulled and fought as hard as I could to create something out of nothing.  I met some very talented and inspiring people along the way.  Thousands to people were part of this journey, and I could not have gotten anywhere as far as we did without everyone.

• Advisors like Gina Cuff and Hoon Kong.  Advisors that also personally invested themselves into the company like: Jonathan Sposato, Barbary Brunner, and Rob Adams.  Even informal ones like Leo Novsky and Travis Jones that helped me navigate those tumultuous waters.  I worked for Logic20/20 from 2011 to 2014, and they have continued to support me even after leaving the company in ways that I will forever be grateful for - Thank you Christian, Ellen and Travis for everything.  
• Investors like Gary Rubens, Heather Redman, Rebecca Nordlander, and Rudy Gadre that go above and beyond with the quality time they spend with you.  Gary would take me out to hit golf balls for hours while coaching my golf swing and my business acumen.  Heather Redman would take me to go get our nails done.  Barbary who would take the phone call day or night, within hours of needing help.  Man, I remember the day Rebecca called me and said, "I woke up this morning and decided I'm wiring you money.  Go out there and make it happen!"  She's awesome.   Rudy, heart of gold and one of the best brains out there.
• Past employees, founders and team members like Stuart Owen, Christie Tarazon, Sean Zhong, Gina Cuff, Melissa Glidden, Arianna O'Dell, Hoon Kong, Jon Peck, and Valentine Gunko.  So many memories.  The other co-founders: Stuart is raw talent and incredibly smart.  Christie not just talented, but my goodness, one of the strongest women I know.  What Christie endured and pushed through during that first year is super human stuff.
• Lawyers like Lee Schindler and Adam Phillipp.  They are absolutely my go-to humans when on a startup journey and would not go anywhere else.  
• Accelerators and incubators that gave us a shot like 9Mile Labs and 500 Startups.  500 Startups where all of this startup theory really landed.  Hard.  Very pregnant.  So much truth and learning.
• Family and friends that helped give us hope, especially when times were REALLY tough.  Susan L. who surprised me with gifting requests and proactively gave so much insightful feedback.   
• Partners like butter LONDON, and B&H Photo Video that went above and beyond to help give the business shape and life.  B&H Photo Video Yosef called me days after our first ad-hoc meeting and gave me tips that ultimately gave birth to our beautiful business model.  Oh, and Stacy Kincaid who worked with us during the Providence Health relationship.  Really good people left and right.
• Most importantly, my husband, @luggagedonkey.  He covered so much on the family and home front, with our baby, my in-laws, my mother, my brother, everything.  And he cheered me on so fiercely, there's no doubt that he's my co-founder in anything I do in life.  The best kind of co-founder one could ever ask or pray for.

Spring to Summer of 2016 was really hard.  I thought I could be superwoman, having just given birth to my Lentil - that with the help of my awesome team, we could pull through this together.  Deep post partum depression.  I spent the summer of 2016 in a deep depression.  Deep despair.  My husband often had to peel my salty existence off the floor and into bed.  I did not feel like I even deserved to be alive.  I often thought the world, my husband, Lentil, everyone would be better off without me.  A waste of space.  Unworthy of the air I took in.  I looked at the sweet innocent face of Lentil and would end up crying because I felt I did not deserve to be his mother.

My advisors and investors starting sitting down to give me the "talk" in 2016.  They told me it was okay - to close it down and give them the write-off.  They told me to get going on the next startup because that one was the one they wanted in on.  I tried for one last hurrah in the fall of 2016, with my "AJ" by my side (thanks to my investors, especially Rudy, for giving me that one last swing at the ball).  Fall of 2016 was not the season of generosity and giving.  Power was changing hands - and the air was filled with emotions between the Clinton versus the Trump camps.  

​January - March 2017 I spent most of it on the verge of tears or crying my face off or finding a place to belong.  I'd be fine, and then while brushing my teeth with my husband in the bathroom, I'd tear up.  Standing in the kitchen I'd tear up.  I tried to get "out there" and involved in the community to pick up my spirits.  I tried to do this "Red Scarf" thing which was all about giving it forward to another woman entrepreneur.  I spent a bit of time doing office hours.  I put together events.  I volunteered to help the Riveter launch.  I did consulting on the side.  I advised any startup that came our way.  I really wanted to help this tiny little startup company called CakeCodes (which later became Storm and one I am part of today).  

And here we are.  May 2018.  I should really have called it quits back in the Winter of 2015/Spring of 2016.  I definitely should have in the Summer of 2016.  I absolutely should have sometime in 2017.  It is now officially May.  We are in the first week of May 2018 and I am finally officially and publicly - calling it done.  

Hope this post helps someone out there.  If you ever want to talk, please do not hesitate to reach out to me.  It is so lonely being an entrepreneur, a founder, in startups, being a founder CEO, raising funds, doing the grind, having employees, figuring out how to be a mom as a founder, all of it.  The emotional depression and the depth of despair that one experiences is so great, I wonder how many of us are suffering silently. 

Hugs to you out there trying to change the world.

​--Arry
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